Sunday, December 2, 2012


Honest, emotional brokenness is a state where our hearts are fully exposed, naked, and vulnerable, where we can no longer find the strength within ourselves, but must seek outwards to God and to community. Brokenness is a state of humility and complete humanness as you sit in your messiness. Painfully beautiful because the armour of protection that we have erected to harden the exterior shell of our hearts has been penetrated to show that we can still feel and bleed. It allows us to trust in God rather than in our own capacity because we have found ourselves in the dark abyss of the well we have fallen into with no way out, only finding ourselves looking up into the light as God reaches to our rescue. In this honest brokenness, our masks begin to peel off and we look at ourselves truthfully. There is no energy for false portrayals, only realness, struggles, weaknesses, and tears as we cry out with childlike hearts to our Daddy to rescue us.
God’s love and grace in moments of emotional brokenness reveal the beauty of His heart. He calls us to a higher place of worship. It is in the wrestling and struggling, in the vulnerability and surrender, where we find our identity in Christ. It is where we learn to love others and sit with them where they are. We are not annoyed because they are not where we want them to be, but are perfectly content in walking at their pace with them as God has with us. We learn to accept their messiness because we realize our messiness is the same. “Every human being on earth, regardless of their gifts and strengths, is weak, vulnerable, and dependent on God and others” (Scazzero, 2006, p. 34). Being broken calls us to a higher calling of love because Christ pours an abundance of His love over us. “By failing to let others be themselves before God and move at their own pace, we inevitably project onto them our own discomfort with their choice to live life differently than we do” (Scazzero, 2006, p.37).

Tuesday, October 9, 2012

Spoken Word: A Man's Promise

Our Love Story!

Hello beautifuls,

I had to share this beautiful encouraging love story with you.
It touched my heart to see this beautiful couples love story and to see
how important the tiniest details are to God and how much He loves us!

This girl is beautiful both inside and out and I am completely in admiration of her vulnerability
and how God used her darkest moments to draw others who were brokenhearted near to Him.
Man He is beautiful!

Well anyways, ENJOY!!


Shabby Apple-12 dress giveaway!

Hello beautiful ladies,

I know it's been a while since I've posted.
Perhaps you've thought I've fallen off the face of the planet
or perhaps you haven't thought much of it all.

Either way, I am posting because there is an amazing contest going on!
Amazing contest you say?! Please Lex, Tell us more!!

Well that's what I like to see! I shall proceed!

Shabby Apple is having a lovely giveaway filled with gorgeous vintage style so you too can feel like a classic beauty!

So how do you win?!

Here is a posting from their blog, please do not reply to mine. I added the Shabby Blog link below as well as their facebook page that you can proceed to like. :)

How would you like to win one year of free dresses? That is correct, one for every month October 2012 to October 2013. This means you have will receive the dress of your choice for each month of the year. Fantastic right? We think so! Here are the details on how to enter:
1. You must be a follower of our blog.
2. You must like us on Facebook. 

For EXTRA entries:
1. Tweet about the contest using the hashtag #shabbyapple
2. Blog about the contest.
3. Share the contest on your own Facebook wall. 
Leave a seperate entry for each here on the blog. That is a total of 5 possible entries!
The winner will be announced right here on the blog next Monday October 15. Contest is open to US only. 

                                                                 GOOD LUCK!!

Visit their website:

Facebook Page:

Happy Winnings! 

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

I am ready to spread my wings...

Free to breathe, to live, to just be me.

Gosh it’s been a journey. The struggles have been hard but as I look back at the past few years of my life I see a growth, the process of a transformation, and I wouldn’t change the struggles I’ve been through for anything because they are what have made me who I am today. I used to see struggles as something I wish would just go away, now I see that out of my greatest struggles has come greatness.

I have learned to value the gifts God has given me. I took them for granted until I lost it all and didn’t know how to get it back. Slowly but surely I feel God returning them and I am learning to appreciate them so much more since I’ve had to work for them and can now see what life was like without them.

I have learned to see myself as worthy. When I had once seen myself as worthless, without value.

I have learned to set up healthy boundaries.

I have learned to look at myself honestly and know that I will always need to change and grow.

I’ve learned people come and go, but it’s not the end of the world.

I have learned to see the world as such a beautiful place again. To breathe in life’s beautiful scent. To love people again. To break for the broken. To break free of the bondage that held me down. To know that I am lovable. To know that I am beautiful. And the outward will fade, but true beauty lies within. To forgive.

I feel as a child exploring the world again and I thank God for the ability to feel this way again. It has been a painful process, but it makes me value the little things all the more.

I am ready to spread my wings.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

To Make You Feel My Love Cover

To Make You Feel My Love (click here)

I got inspired to sing a bit and this is one of my favorite songs. I love Adele's rendition of it but the first time I heard it I believe it was Garth Brooks who sang it. I'm not entirely sure who's version I did, perhaps some of my own, but anyways here it is :)

The pics are also just a little something from a "shoot" we did. 



I’ve come to realize I’ve been a pretty slow learner in this life, but my God is so good and faithful to continue to work on me. I’ve been having to read a lot for school and different things made me really take a look at myself. I realized from an early age that relationships with people cause pain. Any relationship not just romance. That trust lacked. I wanted to be close to someone to let someone in but fearful of the pain they would cause when I did. The pain of being pushed away and rejected. The pain of not being good enough and failing once again somehow. Especially with a male. The pain of opening up and then broken. I held on for way to long to different hurts and attempted to avoid those pains again with all my human might but still trying to fill the void of being “loved” cared for or of some worth, without realizing I was repeating a cycle of hurt. I would genuinely care for a person and show interest but once feelings got too much that I would be filled with fear, the risk was too much and I would run away. I was only looking from my perspective though. It wasn’t until I realized the hurt I have caused others that I was able to fully forgive those who have hurt me. I’ve realized, we’re all human, wanting to feel loved and cared for but so frightened of being hurt we do things to avoid that pain. Although some people may intentionally go out to hurt others, I think the majority of people are just not really thinking of how actions affect others rather our concern is self-protection. I ask anyone I have hurt before for your forgiveness. I am truly sorry for my selfishness. Of being so afraid to get close I’ve pushed you away, or perhaps lead anyone on, broken hearts, damaged you for other relationships, caused you to be afraid of letting anyone in. I don’t know all the damage I’ve done, but I truly apologize from the bottom of my heart. I pray to God that people I’ve hurt in the past won’t have to pay for my mistakes. That He will heal your hearts and let you love fully. To those that have hurt me, if you ever worry or hold anything against yourself. Please don’t. You are forgiven. My heart has been replaced with love for you. To the most present one, I know it’s been a hard year, know that I pray for you and pray that God just pours His love on you abundantly and that you’ll succeed in everything you do. I know I’ve had a hard time forgiving in the past but God has really spoken to me in this area. I am no one to not forgive others, especially when I myself have hurt so many. Of sinners, I am the biggest. I don’t even deserve Gods love or forgiveness. I deserve for Him to have left me a long time ago. But if He hasn’t and has still loved me knowing all the hurt I’d cause Him, who am I to not forgive others?

We’re all just broken vessels trying to stay afloat.

Saturday, April 2, 2011

This is my unspoken letter to you

Dear you,

I stumbled upon a page of yours the other day and it inspired me to write in hopes that maybe one day you'll stumble upon this and in someway I can communicate the things I've been wanting to say and have been carrying with me.

I want you to know how happy I am for you. To see that smile on your face, that joy. I can't help but smile back. To see you united with your family couldn't make me happier! I've been praying for you I hope that doesn't sound weird, but I've been praying that He would draw you close to Him once more. I know events had taken you so far away and had made you angry at Him which is completely understandable. I think everyone goes through those moments but to read the way you wrote about Him filled my soul with happiness. To see you so close with your family, your sister especially, I wish I had the words to say, to express how enthused I am, because she's looked up to you all along. I hope this doesn't come across weird, I mean all of this 100% and I wish somehow that I could tell you this in person but I know that will never be, so I hope you'll one day read this.

Your art, your words so eloquent, like poetry have improved and am excited to see how far you'll go and where God will take you. I can't help but think that there was so much unsaid and because of that I think there is so much misunderstanding between what happened. I don't even know. I don't know how you see things through your perspective of what happened if somehow we both ended up feeling the same way but neither one spoke out. I still cry about it all perhaps wishing things didn't end up the way they did or that things would have been worked through. I tried to act all strong that day, that call, I didn't want to argue, but I didn't know what to say, I just remember crying once we hung up. I was angry hurt and felt so many things at once.

I don't know how you felt about it all but I want you to know that one day while sitting at church God put you on my heart and removed anger and bitterness with forgiveness and love and I've been praying for you ever since. I hope one day you'll forgive me too. I'm sorry for being so weak at that moment in my life that I wasn't strong enough to be what you needed at that time too. Truly, I apologize. That was more weight than you could carry.

I will continue to hold you in my prayers and just wanted you to know I'm happy for you.

Again I hope this doesn't sound too weird either, but I'm glad you found love again. I don't want this to sound insincere, at first I was taken back, but I think she's what you need :) I think she'll draw out your strengths and help you grow in this season of your life and it seems the light in your eyes has returned.
And although a part of it hurts, the part within me that cares for you is truly, happy for you :)

a part of your past.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Bri & Lex..Pix & vids

Yea, Bri & I are at it again. Pics. Vids. We were just being silly little nooblets :)

This was us fooling around to: Iron Maiden's Metal version of Phantom of the Opera.

 Life is full of beauty. Notice it. Notice the bumble bee, the small child, and the smiling faces. Smell the rain, and feel the wind. Live your life to the fullest potential, and fight for your dreams.
-Ashley Smith
 This is my wish for you: Comfort on difficult days, smiles when sadness intrudes, rainbows to follow the clouds, laughter to kiss your lips, sunsets to warm your heart, hugs when spirits sag, beauty for your eyes to see, friendships to brighten your being, faith so that you can believe, confidence for when you doubt, courage to know yourself, patience to accept the truth, Love to complete your life.
 When we long for life without difficulties, remind us that oaks grow strong in contrary winds and diamonds are made under pressure” -Peter Marshall

Girls Just Want to Have Fun! (image heavy)

So yea, even though I'm going to be 25 this year there's this little 5 year old girl in me who doesn't seem to ever get old. She's the part of me that simply loves unicorns, mermaids, kid movies, and well obviously, playing dress up! Luckily I have a great friend to have these adventures with :)
You can follow Bri.  <--click here

She's freaking amazing, adorable and talented! :)

Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Baby Its Cold Outside

Bri and I just wanted to wish you a silly Merry Christmas! :)
Keep warm fellow comrades!

Saturday, December 18, 2010

Indian Warrior Princess Makeup Tutorial

Hope you guys enjoy it :) I had a fun time doing it. It's been a while, but this art piece has been inspiring me for awhile now :)

Friday, December 17, 2010

An Unsweetened Tale [silly video].

This is what happens when boredom strikes :)

I want to thank Adam for being such a good sport and playing along with me <3
I loveth you best friend <3

You guys can actually go check out his blog at
Hit him up.

Thanks for watching and hopefully you found it somewhat amusing, if not, we did :)


Indian Warrior Princess [image heavy]

 My Inspiration for it all.
<3 Lex