Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Just a little Venting.

Have you ever just sat there, the only sound around is the beat the clock makes while it ticks. Your body, frozen still, while your mind is running 1,000 miles per hour, yet everything's a blur.
The only thing you feel are the warm tears that run down your face.
The overwhelming weight of your heart has you plastered to where you lay.
And you start to ask yourself, how did I get here?
How did I become this way?

God can you hear me? Are you watching me anymore? Have I pushed you too far?

I know I've been so angry with You and just shut You out.
It's just this is all too overwhelming and I've grown hopeless.
But I can't make it through this without You. Can you still hear me?

then to get up and go to work, hoping you could make it through the day without crying and making a scene.

Have you ever felt your heart grow hard?  Barricaded by the walls  built around it?
Only left confused on how to tear them down? They're so strong and heavy, you try to remove one brick at a time, and all of a sudden an intimidating factor appears and that one brick that was taken off has been placed back and stacked three rows higher.

There gets to a point you almost begin to feel not human. Numb. and yet there is still pain.
I don't really know. There's so much confusion and pain inside that I can't even begin to verbally express the surface of it all. but somehow it almost feels like your dead inside.

The people you once felt so comfortable with are just a constant reminder of how you've changed. The awkwardness settles as your in a room filled with people, laughing, joking, and you long so much to just feel that for a moment, and partake in the joy but instead your silent, alone, and just more aware of how different you've become and wondering if you'll ever be that way again.

Maybe you've noticed that I haven't said I to any of this, rather you, I think for one I'm wondering if I'm alone here, and second, to express this under I, scares me. I don't know, it's written all the same, but to claim and confess all of this, just scares me.

I've just grown so weary of it all and at the end of the day, I just feel completely foolish.

Well I guess that's enough venting for  today.

I wish I could be here doing this right now.

Friday, April 16, 2010

For the Love of Music: Vedera

                                            I guess it's all about the music today!

Do yourself a favor ladies and check them out!! Her voice is frikkin' amazing!

you can visit there site here <-

and I couldn't find the songs I really like to show you but go to and type out Vedera and then look for the songs Redemption and Moments Rewound!

Let me know what you think :) I hope you like it just as much as I do!

For the Love of Music

One of the things I love about music is the instant connection there is between one's heart and the words. All the words locked up I cannot put to words someone else has been able to so perfectly put together, and all of a sudden, it feels as though someone else shares my heart, my hurts, my pains, my joys, my quirkiness, my anger, my fear, my craziness. You name it, someone else has written about it. And all of a sudden, there's a bond that is made with that artist. Although you've never met, when you sing along to the words there is some special connection, the artist has no idea they've made but all of a sudden you see them differently.

So many songs have touched me but my latest obsession is Alison Sudol from A Fine Frenzy!

I've loved her since I first heard of her and each of her songs touches at least one part of my heart. A few years back that connection was Almost Lover, so much I did the cover of it I showed you guys in this post. Lately the song I seem to keep on repeat is The Beacon.
 <object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value=""></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>

For some reason, I relate to the person she's talking about and it's the whole role the two play in each others love. The care and love she feels for that person. While the person doesn't feel good enough. I don't know but that song just puts me in that place every time.

I'm actually trying to learn it to do a cover :)
I can't find instrumentals anywhere nor piano tutorials, so I'm going to try and learn it on guitar.

So I guess that's the song for my mellow mood.

but my gosh her other songs!! I love blow away, there's something so playful about her upbeat songs. I've always lived in this imaginary world and when I express things usually it's exaplained in these weird visuals and sometimes listening to her songs makes me feel like I'm not alone in that, in all actuality I see the beauty in it.

ok so now I'm babbling, all about one person! but you see it's not just her music I like.
I love the fact she's modest! Her style is absolutely adorable without revealing anything. Her face is that of sincerity and when she smiles it's like everything's okay. I know it sounds a tad lame me saying that but it's like the pureness of a child's smile.

Ps. I totally wish I had those dimples!

Ok so I'm slightly obsessed but how can I not be? Looking at her reminds me of that childlike happiness and imagination that I miss so much.

She may have no idea but there's a strong connection to her music that has been as if her very arms have embraced my heart.

I'm sure you've all heard of her, if you haven't check her out.

I just wanted to share my latest obsession/connection.

Hope you're all doing wonderful!!

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Paola loves to shop Giveaway Winners!

Hello lovelies!! Thank you for all who participated in Paola Loves to Shop's Giveaway..

So now we proudly present..... THE WINNER!!!!

drum rolls please................

Olivia from S&O Productions!!

Congrats hun you totally deserve all those precious goodies!

but wait folks that's not all! Paola is super awesome and decided to throw in a bonus for 7 lucky people!!! 

and they are:

Bebe Bird Beck
Catherine Barton
Congratulations to all you lovely ladies!!! Now head on over to Paola Loves to shop and send her an email with your addresses to receive all your goodies!

Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Happy Mail and a Pooptastical Happening!

So I'm the type of person that prefers to hear the bad news first and end on the good news, so that's how this post will go as well.

So this morning when I get to work and as I'm sitting in my desk, I smell this horrid smell, I continued to smell around and I think to myself, is that poop? Could someone have left a dirty diaper somewhere laying around? I asked my husband to sit at my desk and see if he could smell it to, it could be me just going crazy, smelling something thats not there. But he smelled it to. ok so I'm not crazy, now what the heck is it and where is it? Around 9:30am we have our staff meeting so I just figured I'd attend to it later.

An hour into that meeting I smell the poop again. Oh no! Did I touch something with it that now it's on me?! This smell is haunting me. Mind you I was not feeling well this morning. I felt a tad nauseous so this smell did not help.

I go back to my desk and all of a sudden there is that smell again. At this point I thought, let me check the bottom of my sandals. At this point my sandals are tucked underneath me. I lift my skirt to see, and there it is! The culprit! The poop that had attached itself to me! I had been walking around with dog poop on my shoe all day long! Not only was it on my sandal, but now it was on my brown skirt that had just been nicely washed before.

Normally, that may have gotten me a tad annoyed. grrr....but this time I just had to laugh. on to GOOD NEWS!!

Jamie from Inspired Mess had a giveaway and I was one of the Mini-Giveaway winners! YIPPEE!!!
And omg! I opened my mailbox today grabbed the package ripped it open and found my sweet ol' goodies that just made me SMILE!

Look at all her sweetness!! Thank you Jamie! You're the best!! I absolutely adore you!
Thank you for all of this wonderfulness!! You made my poopy day all better!!!!!! :)

You all should go visit her page if you haven't, which I'm sure you've all been there, but just in case! ^_^

Saturday, April 10, 2010

A Frikkin' Sweet Giveaway!

Hello ladies!! I know we all love giveaways!! This is a collabo giveaway with the lovely Paola from Paola loves to shop :)

You'll be winning a few of the items from her shop.
Okay so what do you gotta do to get one of these beauts?
Good question.

1. You must be a follower of Paola Loves To Shop's Blog
2.Become a fan of her facebook
3. You may or may not follow my blog, that parts not the most important.
4. Make sure to leave a comment after you've done all the above :)
5th option: Tweet about the giveaway!

I'm so excited for this giveaway! I hope you are too!!! 


Ps. the giveaway ends this Tuesday!

Friday, April 9, 2010

New hair every day.

Do you ever just get sudden urges? This morning I woke up thinking about teacup chihuahuas and now I've found myself just wanting wigs!! Oh the fun of changing up one's hair according to your mood without the damaging consequences to one's hair! Here are some I wish I had.

I love this color and think it would be so much fun to dress up in! :) but I'd never be bold enough to transform my whole head into this shade! 

                                                Because I've always wanted blue hair.
                                                 Because I love UBER long hair and curls!!
                                             Because I would love to try this FIRE red!
because the length excites me, I've always wanted know what I'd look like blonde and because I've always wanted hair like the girl from Tristan and Isolde!!

I could go on..but really I must stop!!

but but I want them sooo much!! /tear